Panic Attacks

I haven't posted in a while, which I can mainly put down to having no ideas which ironic because I have 20 ideas stored away as drafts but just no inspiration to write them. They just didn't feel like the things I want to write/talk about, they felt a bit generic. As much as I love reading peoples top 5 favourite lipsticks, I just don't really care all that much. Whilst it is true I will probably post things like that in the near future, right now I just don't really have the feel for it. But as always, if there's anything you want to read then I'm all ears.

Okay anywho, much like the title says, today I'm going to be conveying my view on panic attacks. I've only just started having them, I had my first a couple of days ago and it was really bad, it triggered randomly at 10pm and I was silently (yet somehow hysterically?) crying and hyperventilating and a feeling which I can only describe as stage fright.

My second one happened today, at school, in the middle of a lesson. I was in P.E. and got myself wound up over not being able to do something and it felt like everyone was laughing at me and staring and I wanted to world to eat me up. Instead, I had a panic attack and honestly I think panic attacks are worse than the world suddenly growing teeth and chomping at your leg.

I felt like I was about to be sick, again the hyperventilating happened and I was close to tears but luckily managed to restrain it because of my little sense of surroundings (I say this only because you can't focus on anything but what you were anxious about and you begin to fade out of hearing what people are saying or doing) and I also experienced that stage fright feeling I mentioned. I call it this because it's as if you have that feeling you have before a drama performance or before you're about to speak in front of an audience (large or not, it doesn't matter, just depends on the person) and you have that god awful feeling for twenty minutes. Unlike actual stage fright, it doesn't go away after five minutes in and you realise it isn't that bad. It stays. And it stays. And it stays some more. It even lingers around after the panic attack has came to a stop just to remind you about everything you were anxious about, so ha don't worry about forgetting the whole experience because you can't.